Silkworms

Have you ever watched a silkworm spin a cocoon? Tranquil - yet lots of work. The last few weeks PhD-procrastination effort has involved a short walk to the local uni carpark to pick a few mulberry leaves to feed the worms. Ok I get strange looks and the odd question, I'm fairly used to that outcome in life. The worms hatched in June (of course we forgot about them) so only half survived the year long wait to emerge from the envelop in our pantry. Starvation probably beats last years culling effort - I fed the excess worms to the chooks. My Mum used to keep silk worms when we were kids and for some reason I have followed the tradition. Our boys know about the life cycle, watching with varying levels of interest as the worms grow from being a millimetre in size to the current 7cm fat caterpillars. Just last night two started to weave their cocoons. Its time to place more egg cups in the box so they have a safe spot to build their sleepy homes ready to emerge as moths for the fun-reproductive stage of life ; )

I woke with a cold this morning. Great excuse to hang with the boys rather than bury my head into statistics. We'll visit the local growers market, change the silkworms home with clean newspaper, play computer games, build bionicles and dare to shop for school shoes. I remember a motivational speaker at school who recommended doing the ironing when you were sick as you may aswell get the horrid jobs out of the way when you feel awful. She also kindly referred to buckets of chips as buckets of fat. Yes she was the famous nutritionist, Rosemary Stanton who was the Mum of numerous kids at our school. Back then she wasn't as well know as she is today. I tend to use sick days as no thinking days - these normally turn into fun-productive homedays.

Failure

Alas it's official, I've failed to complete my thesis before my candidature ran out. It appears to not be possible to finish a PhD whilst raising three kids, remaining married, birthing a child and moving interstate. Tomorrow my PhD is due- whoops. I still need to finish a paper and the discussion - there is no way I can hand it in.

Tears ran down my face today at the school assembly. I tried really hard to not let anyone realise I was crying. It dawned on me that what I was experiencing at school was worth the wait. My eldest son (10yr old) played the piano at the start of the assembly. I was so proud of him. He volunteered to do it and he played beautifully. He is no Mozart but the Boogie jazz piece he played off by heart made me proud. I wish I had the confidence like him to just give it a go. I watched the kids dance and sing, entertaining all the proud parents in attendance. I was so happy to have the opportunity to see them. It's been lovely watching the kids grow over the past 7.5 years. Just last week the kids dressed up for bookweek. I took an hour away from study to watch the parade. An hour well spent : ) Being a part of the kids life was the type of parent I wanted to be. I can accept an unfinished PhD knowing I managed to be there for most of the little moments such as assembly today.

I'm sure the tears were provoked by my knowledge of the eminent failure. At the assembly I felt anything but a failure. I felt like a proud mother of three gorgeous boys. Ok I failed to finish my PhD before my candidature ran out. Life and family is worth this slight failure. Luckily I have one years extension on my candidature so I'll still finish the PhD monster. Stay tuned- its getting close!

Aims or objectives or hypothesis or goal or enlightenment= 42

The answer is 42. If only we knew the question. Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy is a classic book that seems to answer why a PhD thesis is so difficult. If we know the answer then we need to know the question. Neither is easy to define. Today I have put the entire day aside to make my thesis aims and objectives clear.

Studying across three differing universities makes the "simple" (lol) task of writing my aims seem impossible. Everyone has differing views and styles. Hmmmm which one is correct? Well that is the beauty of it, clearly if no one agrees then there is not a black and white answer. The main thing is to make them clear so the reader can work out what you are attempting to do and so the discussion can link nicely back into them.  I'd be fascinated to hear if any student used the same aims/objectives in their final thesis as they did in their proposal. Your ideas are refined during your candidature and it's unlikely they are the same at the end as when you started. If they were the same as your proposal was the journey really worth it? Did you learn on the way?

So in order to better work out the ideal "aim" I've been procrastinating by searching the web. Here are some interesting sites I found- just to fuel your own procrastination. If you know some good sites for thesis writing - especially  aims -please leave a comment.

How to write a PhD thesis

http://3monththesis.com/how-to-write-a-phd-thesis/

 

What is a Thesis Statement?

http://www.experiment-resources.com/what-is-a-thesis-statement.html

How to Write a Thesis:

http://ciips.ee.uwa.edu.au/pub/HowToWriteAThesis.pdf 

 

Marias Diploma and Ph.D Thesis writing suggestions

http://www.genetik.uni-koeln.de/groups/Leptin/links/thesis/Thesis_writing_rules.htm

 

Writing a thesis proposal

http://sydney.edu.au/stuserv/documents/thesisproposal.pdf

 

10 easy ways to fail a Ph.D.

http://matt.might.net/articles/ways-to-fail-a-phd/

Aims, Objectives and Guidelines for PhD Students

http://www.cs.bris.ac.uk/Teaching/learning/phd-guidelines.html

Planning a PhD: Getting Your Research aim/question Right

http://www.brighthub.com/education/postgraduate/articles/68825.aspx

With this small selection of web-sites and numerous completed PhD thesis to guide me I'm a step closer to knowing the question, but then again maybe my answer isn't 42.

Conferences

It's been a week since the Perth conference. I was in the wrong headspace for the conference. All I wanted to do was to finish this never ending PhD. It was great to catch up with friends, especially the Project Vesta researchers. Most of the time I spent thinking how much I'd rather be writing than listening. Normally a conference is motivational but this time it was a hindrance. I was dreading telling everyone I've still not finished. I actually ran into the right person just before I boarded the plane. He took something like ten years to finish his PhD and he has since gone on to have a  great career. This gave me some peace of mind. I've seen many students start and finish in my time studying. Its always lovely to see their delighted faces when its all over. Best part of the conference was walking around the Kings Park garden. The wildflowers were exquisite.

Bunny

A new distraction has hopped my way. A very cute bunny was discovered by our dog hiding under a car on Sat. I've always told my kids if they caught a rabbit they could keep it. This offer was made knowing full well they had little hope of catching the wild rabbits. It appears this rabbit is not wild - it was friendly and very fat. So we now have a new pet rabbit until someone claims the little fella. The chances are slim as I gather people dump unwanted rabbits at the uni. The environmentalist in me should know better as rabbits are a pest in Australia. We joked on facebook about making rabbit pie, alas the kids have become instantly fond of the cute fury little fella. So another excuse to procrastinate away from finishing my PhD.

A fabulous mum friend has nearly finished her PhD. Its been a long ten years for her and light is appearing at the end of the tunnel. I'm still dabbling in statistics so the light keeps fading away. By the time I've finished I think a paper on the limitations of statistics needs to be written. I'm off to Perth to another conference next week. I'm using the conference as a writing retreat away from the kids to get this crazy thing finished. Back to statistics today.

  

Sanity with three boys

There is a simple way to stay sane with three boys before the school bus whisks them away for the day.
Don't stress the little details
Our socks tend to not match and the toys aren't put away. This means handball can be enjoyed outside by all. I did draw the line at the geopicks being swung around. Geopicks in the front yard are a by-product of having a geologist for a dad. Hospital trips before school is not a good look with a pick in the head. Yesterday it was a clay ball in the ear that caused Liam to miss the school bus. Nothing a bit of ice couldn't fix. Today was sane, yesterday maybe not so. That's life with three boys. I spent yesterday trying to make my data normal using logarithmic equations in "R".  Today it's on to randomForest. I keep picturing beautiful rainforests but alas its data crunching and computer programming.

Anything is better than working on my PhD

Ahhhh the washing needs hanging out, a paper needs reviewing, an honours student needs a meeting. Anything is better than working on my own PhD. An ex PhD student passed on a gem of advice the other day. By the end of his PhD he hated it sooooo much that he realised everyday spent procrastinating was one more day he'd have to wait until the PhD torment was over. I kinda got what he meant. Time to end the torment. However the latest PhD avoidance trip to Port Macquarie was well worth the time. Three lucky boys wagging school standing on a turbidite. Another four days of PhD torment is worth a trip away with the kids. Now that I'm sitting here having lost four days the PhD hatred is creeping back. On with a life of regression analysis.